Later that night, Angel found Wesley on the rooftop, standing perfectly still and staring out over the city. Knowing, and also having expressly been told, that platitudes wouldn't help the situation, Angel simply joined Wesley at the edge and stared out over the city. Their city.
"It felt so *real*," Wesley said quietly after a few moments as he continued to study the skyline.
"It was meant to," Angel replied. "Wanted to get under your skin. It – or whoever designed it – knew you were the strong one in the group."
"That still doesn't justify my actions here tonight. I should have found another way."
Angel turned to look at Wesley. "You did what you had to, to protect Fred."
"No, I did what I had to do to protect *you*. It would have been very simple to incapacitate him - *it* - enough to get Fred away, but not enough to get her away and keep you safe as well."
"But you found a way." Angel shook his head. "I wish Cordy was here. She'd know what to say."
A ghost of a smile touched Wesley's lips. "That she would."
"And now that it appears any thought you had of jumping has disappeared for the time being, I think I'll take my chance and leave you alone for the night. If you decide to take a personal day tomorrow, no one's going to fault you." Angel clapped Wesley on the shoulder before turning and starting towards the door.
"Angel." It was said so softly that Angel wasn't sure if he had heard it or just imagined it.
Turning, it was as if the years had melted away and Wesley looked as needy and lost as the morning after they had saved Cordelia from Barney. "Come on," he said. "I'll make you some food if you want."
Wesley followed him back down into the building and into Angel's apartment. They were silent for the most part as Angel made Wesley breakfast at 2 a.m. As Wesley ate, Angel couldn't help but remember past nights where a similar scene had transpired. Many times it had included Cordelia, but not always. And, after practically every one of those meals, Angel had given Wesley a back massage. It had started after a particularly nasty fight with a Keexal demon and both Cordelia and Wesley had come back sore and stiff. Cordelia had gone home to take a hot bath, but Wesley had lingered – more from a desire *not* to go home, Angel had suspected, than anything else. So, Angel had offered a back massage, in part to relieve the tension in Wesley's body, and, in part, so Angel could check the other man over for any injuries that Wesley wouldn't admit to. Not much was ever said about that part of their relationship, but Angel knew that they both got a lot out of it. Angel had been able to provide Wesley with needed physical comfort, as well as human contact, and Wesley, unknowingly, allowed Angel to care for one of the humans that had found a place in his heart. The 'clink' of the fork against the plate brought Angel out of his reverie, and he found that Wesley had finished eating. As he cleaned up, Angel thought Wesley looked at least a tiny bit better, if still exhausted.
"Do you want to stay here tonight?" he asked, hoping that Wesley would agree – as much for Angel's sake as well as his own.
"We aren't exactly prime candidates for a slumber party," Wesley replied dryly as he stood and prepared to leave.
Angel responded by giving him a sarcastic "You're hilarious" look before saying, "I just thought that you might want to since you're exhausted and, plus, you wouldn't have to drive home. It'll be like old times."
"I seriously doubt anything will ever be like old times, Angel."
"Maybe not." He started to close the distance between them. "But we don't have to do anything unless you want to. It's better than going home to an empty apartment and a full bottle and you know it." Now Angel was a hair's breath away from Wesley, who had his hand on the doorknob.
After a tense moment of silence and the tiniest shift in Wesley's posture, came the ragged reply of, "Touch me?" Coming from Wesley, this would be an odd request to anyone except Angel, but Angel thanked whatever higher power was out there for it.
"No problem." Angel gently put his hand against Wesley's shoulder. The younger man leaned back into the touch before turning and grabbing hold of Angel. Angel held him tight as quiet sobs racked Wesley's body. When Wesley pulled away and sniffed, Angel gently ran his hands down Wesley's arms and tugged his hands. "Come on, I know something that'll make you feel better."
Angel led Wesley back to his bedroom and Wesley hovered just inside the doorway as Angel retrieved some oil, a towel, and a glass of water. Seeing that Wesley was hesitating, Angel put the items down and went over to him. Angel put his hand on the juncture of Wesley's neck and shoulder and, as he gently stroked the skin, softly said, "You don't have to do this if you don't want to."
"I know I don't," Wesley replied, "but you're right – staying here would be better than where I'd otherwise be. And you always knew how to make me feel better after a particularly hard day."
"Good." Testing the waters, Angel started unbuttoning Wesley's shirt, but by the third button, Wesley's hands had come up and taken over. As Wesley mechanically stripped down completely and lay on the bed on his stomach, Angel stripped down to his boxers, not wanting to get any oil on his clothes and joined him on the bed.
Angel poured a small amount of the lightly scented oil onto his palm and emulsified it before starting on Wesley's back. He slowly ran his hands along Wesley's spine from the base to his shoulder blades and then out and across his shoulders. The warmth of Wesley's skin sank into Angel's hands as he felt the tenseness in Wesley's body and began to gently and tenderly work the knots out of Wesley's back. Neither one of them talked as Angel worked, though the occasional grunt or sigh let Angel know when things were going either good or bad or which parts needed a little extra work. Angel relished being able to touch Wesley's smooth skin once again that was marred by small scars that, no doubt, each told a story of Wesley's training as well as their life together. And no more than now did Angel wish he could take the scars and their attendant memories and pain away.
Angel also worked Wesley's arms, hands, legs, and feet while he was at it and could feel a level of relaxation take hold of Wesley that Angel guessed he hadn't felt in a long time. Once he was done, Angel moved onto the unoccupied side of the bed and wiped his hands off before slowly and gently rubbing Wesley down with the towel to take away the excess oil. The other man's breathing was slow and steady, but Angel knew that he wasn't asleep just yet.
"Here," he said, touching Wesley on the shoulder and handing the glass of water over Wesley's shoulder. "You should drink this."
Wesley moved languidly to shift onto his side away from Angel so he could take the glass and drink before reaching over to place it on the nightstand next to his side of the bed before settling back down. As he did so, Angel could smell that Wesley had become aroused, but didn't seem to notice – which, Angel suspected, considering Wesley's mental state that night, was completely understandable. It hadn't been uncommon for this to happen in the past when Angel did this for Wesley. It was never talked about, but it was an unexpected intimacy that they found they enjoyed sharing.
Angel decided to take a chance and stretched out behind Wesley, his chest and hips lightly pressed against Wesley's back and ass. He gently snaked an arm between Wesley's neck and the pillow, so Wesley's cheek was resting against the inside of his upper arm and he held Wesley close. Wesley put up a token struggle, which Angel knew was more out of confusion than an actual desire to get away. He relaxed against Angel as soon as Angel's right arm came around and he loosely grasped Wesley's erect cock. Angel began to slowly and steadily stroke Wesley's cock, wanting the tension to build and drive Wesley just a little crazy. Soon, Wesley was responding as Angel knew he would – he was pressed tight against Angel's chest, his hips were gently rocking into Angel's hand, his breath was shallower and coming in short puffs, his cock was like granite, and precum had slicked both Wesley's cock and the inside of Angel's hand. Through all of this, Angel kept the pace steady. When Wesley began to softly whimper, Angel began to lightly kiss along Wesley's exposed neck, knowing just the right spots to nip and suck. It didn't take long before Wesley's body stilled, his cock tightened, and he came. Angel held him tight as he did so, gently milking his cock through the orgasm.
After Wesley had finished, Angel used the towel to clean him up and by the time he was done, Wesley had slipped into a doze. Angel grabbed the down duvet that had inhabited the foot of his bed since he had moved in and pulled it up over their bodies as he settled next to Wesley again and pulled him close. He had a feeling that Wesley was going to be all right.